Cry of the Day: 35-year-old Sydneysider Kristian Anderson was recently diagnosed with cancer and is currently undergoing chemotherapy. Despite his illness, he wanted to express his gratitude for all the support he’s received from his wife Rachel, so he made her this special birthday video, complete with cameos by New Zealand Prime Minister John Key and actor Hugh Jackman.

Better get the plumber on the phone, because you’re about to break a water main.

[news.com.au]

Kids Pwn The Darndest Noobs of the Day: Forget soap — this 7-year-old needs to have her mouth washed out with turpentine.

(NSFW, spawn of satan.)

[videogum.]

Time-Lapse Thing of the Day: A time-lapse of the Earth’s rotation as seen from the International Space Station, captured by NASA astronaut Don Pettit, and set to Goldfrapp’s “Utopia.”

[gizmodo.]

Witness Statement of the Day: On Wednesday, two armed men entered a Shell gas station on Bannister Rd. in Kansas City and demanded money, when suddenly… you know what? Why don’t I just let this lovely lady fill you in.

inb4 the Gregory Brothers’ “Backing Up Song” tops the Billboard Hot 100.

[internettoday.]

Early Bird Special: So what does it look like when 4,000 people gather to throw 120,000 (biodegradable) water balloons at each other in an attempt to set a new world record for the largest water balloon fight?

A little something like this.

[kyleandrews.]